Archives of Our Lives

{a narrow and broad look into the lives of people I love}

Tuesday, July 31, 2007

My Tragic Flaw (One of the Many)

Let the record show (to anyone who read my previous post) that when Kyle and I started discussing ex-girlfriends, it was totally and completely my own doing. I brought it up, and when Kyle tried changing the subject (as any smart husband-to-be would do), it was I who re-directed the conversation back to his ex-girlfriends. My fault. I admit it.

This photo perfectly captures the look Kyle gets when I do silly things like ask, "Did you ever take long walks with any of your other girlfriends at such-and-such-same-place-we-used-
to-go?"

I don't know why I do things like that. It's sick, the way I live my life. The "green monster of jealousy" is something I never thought I would have need to fear. And yet here I am, becoming the kind of girl who morbidly likes to ask about ex-girlfriends, only to sulk around all night in feelings bordering on insecurity. It's ridiculous, plain and simple. I know in the end, I'll have the last laugh because I got the guy... I know I should feel confidant that, if I ever meet any of these ex-girlfriends, Kyle would be proud to introduce me as his wife... And I know I should fight this petty woman I sometimes see in myself...

But as far as I can see, I am a long way off from being perfect.

[And if I ever do chance to meet one of Kyle's ex-girlfriends, I doubt I will walk away with fond memories. But it will make a good post for my blog!]

2 Comments:

Blogger The Burnhams said...

Hi Camille! Oh, how I love the personality of your blog! Everybody's is so different and it is so fun to learn more about you and your future husband... I especially love the picture of him and the oreos:) I will continue to post on my blog too so we can be friends and get to know one another (especially when my baby is born!)

July 31, 2007 at 6:16 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Solid post! You gotta love the drama! Well...maybe you don't love the drama, but I do! It's like an episode of the O.C. starring my own friends.

But I promise you the jealousy goes both ways. It's part of the game I guess. I like to think I'm above that, but I think we all have gotten heated over a bf/gf's ex. I think guys are just a little better at acting tough and not wearing it on their sleeve. That's my experience...

August 1, 2007 at 5:21 PM  

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