Archives of Our Lives

{a narrow and broad look into the lives of people I love}

Sunday, December 23, 2007

Tiggity Taggity...

...Isn't that a painfully cheesy title? All this stay-at-home (a.k.a. unemployed) wife stuff must be scrambling my already-fragile brain cells.

Anyway, I got tagged one time many months ago. Read about it here and here. Then again I got tagged by Molly, only it was while Kyle and I were honeymooning (the Caribbean seems a world away right now), and I never did get around to "doing" it (what is the verb that describes fulfilling the requirements of a tag? Taggerizing?). Anyway, I never taggerized in response to Molly's tag, and now, months later, I've been tagged again by Jami. One of the tags called for six random things about me, and another called for seven. So in combining the two tags, I have decided there is only one way to be truly fair: I will taggerize 6.5 interesting or random things about myself. Here...

That Time I Got Tagged Two More Times...

1. When I was young [so long ago] I could--and would--bite my toenails. Not clip with toenail clippers; bite. With my teeth. I don't know how I never caught an infectious disease from doing this. It's a miracle I am even alive to blog about it today. My immune system must be like granite--I should donate my body to science.

2. At one time I thought of myself as a musical prodigy, and would play the piano and violin at the same time. Then I learned the flute, and added that to my "one-kid spectacular." (Yes, playing the piano with my toes {nails all freshly bitten off} was involved.) Then I decided I could fit a harmonica in there, too. Then I realised I wasn't really a prodigy at all, but just a rather high-strung little girl. And that's how I've remained ever since.

3. I can bake bread. Nicely. Yes I can. My mom made me learn. Most Saturday mornings during my teenhood consisted of Adell and/or me stirring and mixing and kneading and baking. And then most Saturday afternoons one could see us peddling our wares throughout the neighborhood, Adell and me. We felt like urchin beggar children--well, beggar teens--at the time, because some people didn't want to buy our bread, and that, of course, can be quite a hard blow to the teenage-girl (read:self-conscious) ego. But that's how we would earn spending money for family vacations or Christmas presents. Thank you, from the bottom of my heart, to any and every person who ever bought bread from the little street urchins. And an extra big thank you to my mother who forced us to do it, because now I know how, and my husband thinks I'm quite a catch...

4. Even though I am a grown-up girl [some might say, "That's a woman"], I still have inner debates as to what kind of person I should be. I know, I know...most people have this figured out by now. But it's hard for me! I was raised in a middle-middle class family by very hardworking parents. My grandfather closest to me--and a very influencing factor on my life--was a crack-of-dawn kind of farmer. I grew up helping him decapitate chickens, and I thought it was cool to wear their (the dead poultry's) feet around my neck. So obviously, part of me glorifies hard work and rough hands (and a little bit of the macabre).

But somewhere along the line, I also learned how to read. And by reading, I learned about the world. I learned of a place called England, and governments called monarchies (with kings and queens, of course), and that well-known driving factor called "cold, hard cash." I discovered that I liked shiny things, and fancy things, and beautiful things. While part of me sneers at the ridiculous notion of anyone ruling by birth, the other part is mournful that I wasn't born into one of those crowns. And therein lies my eternal inner debate. (Just for the record, though, I do think I would make an excellent Queen. I always have thought so.)

5. I secretly--well, it's no secret anymore--am jealous of people like Keira Knightly. She's beautiful, of course, but moreover, she's played roles in fascinating movies--rolls that I really wanted to play! [I'm not a queen and I'm not a movie star. Woe is me.] Sometimes if I think about their lives too much, I almost talk myself into going to L.A. and auditioning for something--anything. I actually struggle with stuff like this a lot. I used to think I should try out to be the Olsen twins' long-lost triplet sister. For some reason, it's harder for me to deal with movie star success when they're my age. Older people, I just say, "Well of course, Camille. They can be famous because they're older and have had more time to work at it." But that dad-gum Keira was born only a year and a half before me, so that means we're on the same level (age-wise, that is). If the age difference thing doesn't work for to make me feel better about myself (as with other youngish actresses like Anne Hathaway), I used to think, "Well, she's probably slept with tons of filthy scumbag guys. She probably has herpes." But then my freshman year of college, I was diagnosed with the shingles (a form of herpes [a non-sexual form, but herpes nonetheless]) and that self-validation went out the window. Plus I got married, so glorifying my virginity over all the promiscuous Hollywood Starlets' doesn't really work either. Now I just watch the beautiful movie stars in their beautiful movies and think, "Maybe I could play an amazing old person on the big screen, like Angela Lansbury from Murder, She Wrote." {There I go idealising the British, once again...}

6. I once created a contraption that enabled me to urinate from a standing position. It worked. I {successfully} peed standing up. Just like men do all the time (well, sort of "just like" men do...)! Not only am I not embarrassed to publicise this to the world, but I look back on it as one of the high points of my life. A few of my friends joined me in this quest, but I won't mention any of their names or blogs here, in the name of privacy.

6 1/2. I really enjoy dreaming. It's almost a conscious level of enjoyment. For example, I can be asleep, caught up in little details of my dream, and will still think to myself, "This is a really powerful dream I'm having. I can't wait to see what happens in the end!" Just the other night I dreamed an entire story that could easily become a plot of a best-selling novel--- and maybe even a major motion picture (starring me, of course!)! It was about--

Hehehe...I said I was only going to do six and a half!


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9 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

A urination contraption. My goodness, I would NEVER have imagined you to have invested such time and energy into such a thing. This was a fun filled post. I have enjoyed it! ~A

December 23, 2007 at 6:16 PM  
Blogger The Lowry's said...

I enjoy reading your blog. Maybe one day I will stop stalking you by just reading your blog and actually call you, or do something together and actually get to know you in person.
Have a Merry Christmas and we will definitely get together soon.

December 23, 2007 at 9:15 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Poor Kyle!

December 24, 2007 at 8:27 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Millie,

I've said it before, and I'll say it again; I've never quite understood you, nor do I think I ever will. This blog is an excellent manifestation of that. You may be asking, "Hmm...Is that good or bad?" I think it's great. You are such an enigmatic perplexity that one can't help but love you. It's no wonder you have people stalking you, begging to be your friend!

I am proud to say, however, that I already knew all of these things about you, as only a sister does, minus number 6 1/2. I thoroughly enjoyed reading this, though; it brought back many a childhood memories. By the way, where is that pee-while-standing-up contraption? I have forgotten what it looks like...Oh, and Grandma was quite disgusted with that one! Oh well...You can't please them all!

December 25, 2007 at 7:48 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You aew qhy I am raking the classes I am taking on the brain---to try and understand how your brain thinks. I am proud of the distinct and wonderful individual (girl or woman) that you are. My love grows with you as you live a righteous and honorable life leading back to the arms of our Heavenly Mother and Father. Try to understand you're part of their great plan. You're so far away from home but close than ever to those Heavenly parents who sent you here to earth to find out how to get back to where you came from. THAT is part of the royalty you long for and have forgotten. You are the Little Princess in a quest for the precious earthly treasure you came to discover. Idealize away about what it will be like when you find what you came here to find.
My love is always with you.
GMAma

December 25, 2007 at 10:33 PM  
Blogger cheeky said...

I'm just wishing I could still touch my toes to my nose. Not that I want to bite my toe nails - yikes!
It's good you can bake. Food is a one way to a man's heart.

You don't have to stalk. You can say hello and leave a comment. I don't bite, promise! :)

xo

December 26, 2007 at 2:28 PM  
Blogger LetterToKayleen said...

omg. i want that contraption. that's the best invention i've ever heard of. i dream about being able to stand while i pee. you know how much time i'd save by not having to sit? not to mention, i could go anywhere i want. fan-tastic.

December 26, 2007 at 4:57 PM  
Blogger Jami said...

well, I am so glad you answered me, your comments were entertaining to say the least! I also think adells baby is SOO cute, and I am going to go right over and get a picture of him and grace together for the future wedding video...I know that is a bold statement..but I figure from one bold person to anouther. Camille few people know that I did my best make me laugh preformace of my LIFE due to your peeing like a man contraption! Yes, I almost has melissa willis peeing her panties. Oh, and kayleen, there is a contaption out there. you can get them at REI, they are to make camping at better experince for woman.

December 26, 2007 at 8:58 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This post is actually for Jami. Sorry, Mill. Jami, you are welcome to come over any time so we can take pictures of Gracie and Preston. Nothing would make me happier than if he married someone from such a good family! How do you suppose we can make this happen?

December 27, 2007 at 6:17 PM  

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