Archives of Our Lives

{a narrow and broad look into the lives of people I love}

Wednesday, December 12, 2007

{Relationship Struggles}

No, not me and Kyle...

I have met a woman who wants to be my friend. Does this shock you? It should.

Now, don't go thinking I have self-esteem problems--me and myself feel fine about us, really. I am a good person--better than most. I'd even venture to say that I am a great person. {See how fine I'm doing?} But I am not the kind of person who anxiously engages in making friends. I suppose I am nice enough to the people I meet, but when all is said and done, I prefer a few quality friends over a vast range of "so-so" ones. So it is beyond me why I keep meeting people who think I am friend material.

It's more complicated than it sounds. A lot of people would say, "Well, if you don't want to make friends, then stop being friendly!"

That's fine, only what do I do when I have to spend five hours several days a week working with the same one lady? Ignore her? Belittle her? I could pinch her, I guess. Only that would make me less than the great person I am. So instead, I treat her with kindness and respect--in other words, I lead her on. How can I be nice at work, yet leave it at that? She gave me her card--with her phone number--yesterday. I didn't volunteer mine--not at all. "After the Christmas season is over," she said, "let's still be friends! We have so much in common..."

"Well, no. I mean, not really. Actually, I don't like you at a person. You have too many dogs. And cats."

I can't say that. How can I let her down gently?

"Oh...well, unfortunately, I just got out of a bad friendship and I'm not really ready to start up again." Somehow I don't think that is going to cut it.

I don't think simple avoidance would do the trick either. (Immature though it may be, it actually is my first choice. But Lethbridge is a smallish place, and I'm sure I'd run into her sooner or later. And there's always excuses to be made for such bad behaviour. "Why don't you ever call," she'll ask, "I thought we were friends." Avoiding confrontation usually lands me smack in the middle of a bigger confrontation.)

So you see, I'm in a tight spot.

What would you do?

At least there's always Cat Stevens to make my life a delight...but I'll write more on that later.


Blogger kayleen said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

December 12, 2007 at 9:29 PM  
Blogger kayleen said...

well, you could accidently lead her to your blog and accidently let her read this post. that might work.

December 12, 2007 at 9:30 PM  
Blogger Loralee Choate said...

"I appreciate your kindness, but I am just not a social person. I don't handle having friends very well. I really don't like to go anywhere unless it's with my husband and hate talking on the phone. People get really annoyed with me when we try to be friends and so I honestly just hang out with my family and husband. Besides, I am a newlywed and I am busy having constant newlywed sex all the time!! So...I hope that this doesn't hurt your feelings. It's ME not YOU!"

Ok, you don't have to say ALL of those things. (Hee)

December 12, 2007 at 11:20 PM  
Blogger linda rae said...

LOL Loralee !!!

December 13, 2007 at 5:29 AM  
Blogger Geevz said...

Fine I get the hint Camille, we won't be friends anymore. I want my card back.

December 13, 2007 at 12:33 PM  
Blogger RPH said...

Loralee gave the best advice of all, no need to add more! heehhee. she is halarious!

December 13, 2007 at 1:40 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Who is this Loralee person? That was hilarious! It was almost as funny, in fact, as your actual post. You're reached new heights with this one, Millie. Oh, and I was glad to hear music again. I suggest you keep that up, but just make sure you change it regularly. By the way, Kelsey and Ben are pregnant!!! (Ok, fine, just Kelsey. But Ben had an integral role in this, as you should well know by now, you old married woman.) Anyway, she is expecting in June. Isn't that wonderful? Now Gwidon can have a playmate!!! Now if you would just get pregnant, he'd have another cousin the same age. Get a move on--no pun intended!!!

December 13, 2007 at 6:04 PM  
Blogger Jami said...

when I grow up I want to be just like you camille. I accually have a birth annoncement with your name on it...all I need is your address! and I agree with the anonymous need to get pregnate so that grace can have a wonderful "friend", inless your kid is like you and doesn't want any...JUST KIDDING, I am just going to count myself as one of your quality ones.

December 13, 2007 at 10:46 PM  
Blogger Kim said...

Camille coming from being a person who is friendly like you I have had this problem as well. But I think you can just try and be strictly work associates. It might sound weird but some people I have worked with before i would not want to e friends socialy with. So maybe you could break that to her. Love and miss ya Hope all is well!

December 13, 2007 at 10:51 PM  
Blogger Steffen said...

I HATE this dillema! But I love this post, and I LOVE that you love Cat Stevens. And if I were you I would for sure go with what Loralee said. Especially the Newlywed sex part. See, it doesn't make you any less of the great person you are, but it definitely could be effective in warding off potential friends.

December 16, 2007 at 4:43 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You can never have enough friends. They come in very handy in times of joy and sorrow.

December 16, 2007 at 6:01 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You can go to hell too!

December 23, 2007 at 10:41 PM  

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