Archives of Our Lives

{a narrow and broad look into the lives of people I love}

Wednesday, April 2, 2008

{Current Me}

**In lieu of recent Archives of Our Lives happenings [i.e. bearing my heart and soul to this here blog and its 100 daily readers], I have decided to write yet another deep, heart-wrenching, Camille-tells-all kind of post. Just as a warning.**

I’ve noticed a trend in some of my previous "Random Facts About Me” kind of posts: I usually talk about things I used to do, beliefs I used to uphold, or accents I used to embrace. In other words, when people ask me to divulge little-known facts about myself, I often revert to Childhood Camille for said random tidbits. I don’t know why—perhaps I don’t find the current me interesting enough. At any rate, I am taking this opportunity to change that. I give you:

Eight Things About Me Now Which Only Family or B Might Know:

1. I have a penchant for hats. Any and almost every kind of hat is thrilling to me. When I’m shopping and see hats for sale, I invariably try on one or two, just to see how much one of those hats could change who I am. (I have even been known to make an unfortunate hat purchase or two.) I like baseball caps, cowboy hats, gardening hats, sombreros, toques (beanines in American), and flower-woven crowns with flowing ribbon like you can buy at the Renaissance Festival. Any number of hats can make me feel sporty, or chic, trendy, elegant, or free-spirited. The only problem is…hats look awful on me. It has been one of my lifelong sorrows, and, I suspect, why I never got very far in my acting career—any girl who cannot look fittingly enough in hats could never be a movie star. Audrey Hepburn would never have been cast as Eliza Doolittle if she’d not looked so striking in that Ascot hat. And that’s a fact.

2. I have mastered the art of eating Lunchables. Yes, Lunchables. Are those still a highly sought-after choice of lunch for kids around suburban America? Because I know it was a great day for me when I opened up my brown lunch sack and found a treasured Lunchable waiting patiently to be consumed (but this is supposed to be about current me, not childhood me). Since I’m on the road a lot, I’ve found them to be the most healthful nourishment a gas station’s convenience store has to offer. And I’m good at eating them, too. I could eat them in the dark; I could eat them in the park. But that’s another post entirely…

3. I have recently (as in, within the past three or four years) become converted to the “Cover the Toilet Seat” school of thought—so much so that even if the covers aren’t supplied, I always take the time to toilet paper myself.


I’d always been taught this way, but until recently, I never felt compelled to actually use those flimsy tissue-paper coverings sometimes found in public restrooms. I don’t know exactly when I changed, but I know it was a complete conversion. And so help me, if I someday die of AIDS, the world and I will know exactly why. The stupidity and irresponsibility of my wayward days will haunt me forever.

4. I have myself so convinced that I’m going green, I even feel guilty for using tap water to refill my water bottles—and that’s the greenest way to drink water! When I need to boil eggs or cook potatoes, I have nagging thoughts that won’t leave me alone—thoughts like, “I’d better save this potato water to make dinner rolls tonight, or else it will be wasteful,” and, “I could cook these eggs another way, like in a frying pan—using this water really isn’t necessary.” I have yet to decide if this is a bad thing, or simply environmentally responsible.

5. After a long and mournful inner debate, I have come to the conclusion that green is indeed my favourite colour. It was hard to say for a while, because my favourite colour seems to change depending on what I’m observing. My favourite colour of furniture, for example, would be red. But as far as clothing goes, I am quite fond of wearing pink, and sometimes brown. However my favourite colour of house tends to be white, with black trim (a little something I learned about in Belgium). Finally, though, I could not deny it any longer: green is the colour, overall, that makes me happiest. So now you know.

6. Asking me to make a speedy decision is like politely requesting that my four month-old nephew stop screaming when he’s hungry: you can dream all you want, but it’ll never happen. Which is why 70% of our house’s interior walls are still painted the lavender colour its previous owners seemed so fond of (or else bought in the clearance aisle of Home Depot: You Can Do It. We Can Help.). I will decide what colour to paint when, and only when, I am ready to decide.

7. I don’t know the proper way to fold an American flag. I know there’s a trick to it (just like with fitted sheets), but I never learned. And every time I see Old Glory waving proudly in the wind, I feel a little bit of guilt knowing that if our flag fell down, I couldn't walk over, pick it up, and fold it correctly. I should have been a Boy Scout.

8. I feel a perverse satisfaction when I can tear ketchup packets open right along the quarter-circle dotted line. It happens rarely, but when it does...it's magic.

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11 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

funny, funny post. thanks.
lunchables? eeeww.
but i can understand them being the best thing available at a highway truckstop.
and ketchup packets scare me. opened them with my teeth when young, till one day in the zellers cafeteria, i attempted such, packet popped and went up my nose. so embarrassing, oi.

and hey, you're interesting now, big time. you make me laugh. i like that.

kot girl.
(keep on truckin')

April 2, 2008 at 7:46 AM  
Blogger lindsay said...

you and I should join our hat collections. I have a sick fascination with them as well, only mine tend to be quite ugly...and something that you really couldnt get away with wearing in real life. Maybe we should have a dress up party next time you are down...it will give us an excuse to wear them!

i have not, to this very day, ever eaten a lunchable.

And I must give you an A+ for such a perfect example of a proper make-shift toilet cover. You've taken such a skill to a whole new level!

ooooh a black and white house?!?! I tend to lean towards brick and cream...but i do think that black and white may now tie for first...

LOVE the current favs/facts tho! I feel so special knowing such random tidbits about you!

April 2, 2008 at 9:23 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Millie,

You were wrong. I didn't know some of this about you. I feel a little bad because I'm sure Lindsay probably knows most or all of these things. I'm a bad sister. Sorry.

I still cannot understand your obsession with going green. It boggles my mind, if you want to know the honest truth. I;m sure the world would be a better place, though, if there were more Camille P. Strate Fairbanks Worthington IIs, though. Carry on, my dear sister. Carry on.

April 2, 2008 at 10:38 AM  
Blogger Loralee Choate said...

I don't think I've ever been in a situation where I have had to fold an American flag.

Now I am curious about how they fold the Canadian flag. Is it different?

April 2, 2008 at 1:09 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

hi loralee,
jeez, as a canadian i have no frikken idea how we fold our flag. yours is like end over end, in a triangle i think.saw it on tv, marines commercial i think.
have never seen a canadian flag folded. weird eh?
thanks for your comment, interesting.

April 2, 2008 at 1:39 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

camille, you absolutely crack me up. interesting stuff. bye the way-green's my fav color too!

April 2, 2008 at 4:34 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

sorry, but i feel as if i have to clarify. i do not like any shade, only deep, dark green. it reminds me of a jungle:)

April 2, 2008 at 4:35 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

is that forest green, or jungle green? is a jungle darker than a forest?
me love green too.
and brown.
and navy.
and bits of red and gold.

April 2, 2008 at 4:59 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Call home.
MA

April 2, 2008 at 6:26 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

a jungle is not... darker, really. just more... exotic. more bright. less hazy than a forest green. not that a forest green is hazy, exactly.

April 3, 2008 at 3:32 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

i get ya. good imaging. the jungle..very bright, different green on the leaves, vibrant a green, like a green the light moves through, illuminates the leaf. and much sun, and bright, from canopy to floor.

would love to live in jungle, think though, it's aways from the nearest walmart.


forest i've seen..it is hazy, different light, coniferous trees, don't take light through them. quite different. and it's dry and cool.
i think i'll choose jungle. a tree house, with friendly monkeys visiting, but no poop throwing, people.

April 3, 2008 at 6:44 PM  

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